tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60428858221576244282023-11-15T08:49:03.658-08:00The Payne Locker"We have these treasure in jars of clay to show that this all surpassing power is from God and not from us." 2 Corinthians 4:7paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-69141441386200875082012-07-02T07:05:00.001-07:002012-07-02T08:29:49.117-07:00The Fear of the Lord<i>"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline."</i> Proverbs 1:7<br />
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What does it mean to fear God? "God is, in your mind and heart so powerful, so holy, and so awesome that you would not dare to run from Him, but only run to Him." John Piper<br />
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Do I fear God?<br />
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Running to God means I trust Him and His ways.<i> It means I will obey Him. I will take Him at His Word.</i><br />
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Running from God means I trust in myself and my own ways. <i>It means I will disobey Him. I will not take Him at His Word.</i><br />
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A fear of God leads to right living. Not fearing God will lead me into sin. <br />
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"A right fear of the Lord is a preventative good. It prevents us from entering into sin, keeps us from nurturing sin, and drives us out of sin when we fall into it." (William Harrel, Immanuel Pres.) <br />
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Will I run to God or from Him today? How I respond to trial and temptation reveals if I am have a biblical fear of God! <br />
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"Now all has been heard, here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear
God and keep his commandments, for this the whole duty of man. For God
will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing,
whether it is good or evil." Ecc. 12:13-14<br />
<br />paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-65850110898544594272012-06-18T10:11:00.001-07:002012-06-18T10:12:28.830-07:00Isolation Leads to Death<i>"Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment."</i> Proverbs 18:1 (ESV)<br />
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<i>"He WHO willfully separates and estranges himself [from God and man] seeks his own desire and pretext to break out against all wise and sound judgment."</i> Proverbs 18:1 (Amplified Bible)<br />
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One of the greatest danger for any Christian is isolation and yet it's exactly what sin promotes and where it thrives. Invariably when a Christian falls into sin he will begin to pull back from other believers and even corporate worship. That is the exact OPPOSITE of what he needs. Christians NEED fellowship and community to stay rooted and grow!<br />
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Here are a few quotes from Steve Wilson's book <u>Face to Face</u> to consider:<br />
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"....sin isolates men from one another. Sin by its very nature is a proud, selfish insistence on going one's own way, and as such it cuts a man off from everyone around him.<br />
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"We are finite beings and therefore cannot be self-sufficient. We are utterly dependent upon others, and the longer we live, the more we feel this fact. He is a fool who thinks he can live by himself. It is impossible."<br />
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"...many people are attracted the the Romantic idea of escaping into the wilderness, living by themselves, and not depending on anyone else. It is attractive because God alone is self-sufficient, and every rebel wants to be like Him. There is something in the heart of sinful man which dislikes being indebted to anyone. If man is indebted, he is obligated to show his gratitude, and sinful man is not grateful. Instead, he wants everyone indebted to him."<br />
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"We need to be stirred up by others. We cannot live only under our own preaching, there are times when we need the words of others to provoke us to righteousness."<br />
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"All of life points to the necessity of holy communion with godly friends, and everywhere we look, isolation equals death. Physically, man in isolation will die a physical death. Covenantally, the man who rejects godly companions will perish, cut off from the people of God."<br />
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"Thus the ultimate fruition of sin--which is that ultimate expression of our selfishness, going our own way and isolating ourselves--is the isolation of hell. Hell is described in the Bible as exactly that: it is the outer darkness where there is no communion, where one is left utterly and completely alone.... It would be one degree of comfort to suffer with others., since at least there is some communion in that common suffering. But God says that hell is the place of no comfort at all."<br />
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Points to Ponder:<br />
1. Are you isolating yourself?<br />
2. If so, why? Is is shame, guilt, pride or selfishness?<br />
3. What will you do today to pursue fellowship and community? <br />
<br />paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-26120922702195214022012-06-18T09:48:00.001-07:002012-06-18T09:48:43.252-07:00Blogging to RememberI have gone back and forth in my mind as to why I should keep this blog. I have been on the verge of shutting it down on a number of occasions for several reasons....<br />
<ul>
<li> I never write anything.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li> If I did write something, who would seriously want to read it?</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li> Even when I want to write something, I cannot seem to find the time.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li> And if I have the time, I drive myself crazy trying to get the blog "perfect" in content and grammar. I am not a perfectionist about anything but writing!!!</li>
</ul>
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But in the end, I have decided to keep my blog for mostly one reason. I have so many thoughts going through my head, some of them even interesting, but I forget them all so quickly! So, I have decided to blog to keep my thoughts in a safe a place. If you happen to read it, I pray you will benefit from it too! If no one reads it, at least I will have a way to remember the things I keep forgetting!paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-10798479467307269082011-11-15T18:38:00.001-08:002011-11-15T19:29:06.290-08:00He Loves Me!Last week I had the privilege of babysitting for a friend's one year old son. Talk about adorable: pudgy cheeks, squishy thighs, and the cutest little dimpled bottom. I was captivated by this little guy the entire night. As I watched him closely, I was struck by several thoughts:<br />
<ul>
<li> We are image bearers of the Living God; we are made to resemble Him. God gives us a tangible picture of "image bearing" through our own children.They resemble us! I was enthralled as I watched this little guy who was a little bit mother and father in his looks and mannerisms. And, no doubt, the family resemblance will continue to grow as he grows. It is mind boggling to contemplate that God allows you and me to take an active part in creation. He didn't have to include us, but He knew first hand the joy that would be ours. </li>
<li>Family resemblance is another theme that jumped out at me. Children look like their parents. God's children should look like Him. I should have a growing resemblance to our Heavenly Father. In fact, this resemblance is one of they main ways I know His love is upon me.</li>
<li> I studied my little friend as he ate, played, and bathed. I was fascinated by his private conversations and his personal discoveries. I am reminded of the way God watches and delights over His children.</li>
<li>I was constantly watchful of my little friend not wanting him to fall or even stumble. I was aware of the security measures taken by his diligent parents to ensure his safety. I am reminded that God's security measures, the commands of Scripture, speak of his love for me and His desire to protect me. </li>
</ul>
If I pondered longer, I am sure I would "see" more of God as result of my babysitting time. God's classroom is everywhere...even at the feet of a babe. <br />
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<i> “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness."</i> Jeremiah 31:3<br />
<br />paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-39162251676868195272011-11-07T06:51:00.000-08:002011-11-08T04:53:19.654-08:00What's Your Prison?Sometimes, life's circumstances can feel like a prison! Perhaps, your "prison" is a bad marriage, a rebellious child, a houseful of little ones, a looming financial concern, a besetting sin, an illness or some other difficulty. The Apostle Paul was no stranger to imprisonment. He wrote to the Ephesians while in prison and it's worth noting his outlook as he faithfully wore his prisoner chains. Paul says, <i>"For this reason, I, Paul the <u>prisoner of Christ Jesus</u> <u>for the sake of the Gentiles"</u></i> Ephesians 3:1) and <i>"And as a<u> prisoner for the Lord' </u></i>(Ephesians 4:1). Paul was willing to suffer for Christ and for the advancement of the gospel in the lives of others. Are you? Whatever your "prison" circumstances, do you see yourself as a prisoner of the Lord for the sake of others? No doubt, Paul's readers would have thought his situation bleak, but Paul saw it differently. He knew God was in the trouble. He trusted in the Soveriengty of God to superintend every detail of his life, even his suffering. We know, by the power and grace of God, Paul learned to be content wherever
he was and whatever the condition (Philippians 4:10-13). Sinclair
Ferguson writes, "Here Paul, 'the caged bird', sings from a full heart
about the grace of God in the gospel. He is a prisoner, yet the gospel
has set him inwardly free." The gospel can set us free too from our personal chains and prison cell; so take heart wherever you are or whatever your condition! You are not a prisoner of your marriage, but of Christ. You are not a prisoner of a rebellious teen or a house full of toddlers, but of Christ. You are not a prisoner of finances, sickness, or any other calamity, but of Christ. You are not a prison of your sin, but of Christ. Your prison is a platform to preach! Never forget that ultimately you are a prisoner of Jesus Christ and your imprisonment serves to mature you, promote the gospel in others, and ultimately give the Lord Jesus Christ the honor due Him! <br />
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Points to Ponder:<br />
1.What struggle, circumstance, or relationship serves as your "personal prison"?<br />
2. How might viewing yourself as a "prisoner of Christ Jesus" change your outlook?<br />
3. With a biblical outlook, how might your "chains" be used to advance the gospel in your situation?<br />
4. A biblical outlook can only be achieved through a right understanding of God, suffering, and the powerful work of the gospel to set you inwardly free. What practical steps can you take to change your outlook from prison to praise to platform? <br />
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<br />paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-49180605597661058912011-10-31T08:23:00.000-07:002011-11-08T04:53:32.734-08:00What" Impossible" are You Trusting God For?"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all the generations, forever and ever. Amen" (Ephesians 3:20-21). Consider this commentary from Sinclair Ferguson:<br />
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"Our prayers cannot stretch the limits of what God is able to do." <br />
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"God can do<br />
<ul>
<li>All we ask</li>
<li>All we ask or think of asking</li>
<li>More than we can ask or think of asking</li>
<li>More abundantly than all we can ask or think</li>
<li>Far more abundantly than all we can ask or think" </li>
</ul>
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What "impossible" do you find yourself
in today? Do you have a spouse threatening divorce? Is your teenager
rebelling? Do you have mounting financial woes? Are you lonely,
depressed, angry or anxious? Whatever your situation, if you are God's child,
don't underestimate His love for you and his willingness to act on your behalf. Paul prayed for the Ephesians,
"...that you being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to
comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height
and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge..." It is often in times of struggle that we best <i>experience</i> the knowledge of God's love. God does not always remove His children from life's difficulties, but He is able and willing to help us through trials and pain to attain maturity in Christ. Keep praying about the "impossible" and watch God work-around, in and through you!<br />
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Points to Ponder:<br />
1. Do you acknowledge and rest in God's love for you?<br />
2. What in your life seems "impossible"? Have you given up or given it up to God?<br />
3. Do you believe that God can change your circumstances or change you?<br />
4. If you are struggling with unbelief, confess it to the Lord. Ask God to help you know and experience His love and to place your trust in Him and what He can accomplish in times of trial. <br />
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<br />paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-34026988408871225522011-10-25T05:53:00.000-07:002011-11-08T04:53:51.403-08:00Ephesus-The Cultural Climate and the Church<br />
Reading the background of Ephesus, I am struck by the environment in which the Ephesian Church was birthed. I am reminded that the church of Jesus Christ has faced fierce opposition from the very start. God has been saving people to Himself and building His church smack dab in the middle of cultural chaos, today is no different. I am reminded of our Lord's prayer in John 17:<br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;"><i>I pray not that you would take
them from the world,</i></span><span style="color: black;">
</span><span style="color: black;"><i>but that you would keep them from the
evil one.</i></span><span style="color: black;">
</span><span style="color: black;"><i>They are not of the world even
as I am not of the world.</i></span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span style="color: black;"><i>Sanctify them in your truth.
Your word is truth.</i></span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span style="color: black;"><i>As you sent me into the world,
even so I have sent them into the world</i> (</span><span style="color: black;">John 17:15-18).</span>
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Ephesus was the New York City of it's day. It was a major trade city of the Roman empire: heavily populated, cultured, wealthy and accepting of new ideas; except the Truth. "The Ephesians were marginalized in a pluralistic culture tolerant of
many things but not of the Christian gospel or the church which
proclaimed it" (Sinclair Ferguson, Ephesians). Sound familiar?<br />
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Ephesus was influenced largely by the magical arts and religious superstitions of the Orient. What we see today in the New Age movement and other "new" religions oftentimes can be traced back to these same roots. There is nothing new under the sun! I am reminded that man is made to worship. Everyone worships something or someone. <br />
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While Ephesus boasted of numerous temples to various gods and goddess, it was famed for it's temple and worship of the goddess Diana. She was known as the goddess of "virginity and motherhood". Her temple was so large and magnificent it ranked among one of the Seven
Wonders of the World. An image of the goddess was believed to have
fallen from the heavens (Acts 19:35). This idol worship was rooted in the occult and magic.There were shameless and vile practices like prostitution and mutilation in the rituals. It was into this darkness that God brought Paul to shine the light of His Word and work!<br />
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Paul uses this letter to encourage the little band of followers in Ephesus (and surrounding areas) called the church. These early believers needed to know who they were and how they were to be set apart for God's glory, we need that message too. The church is central to Paul's message to the Ephesians because it is central to God's plan. While often weak, small and culturally irrelevant, the church is God's means to grow His children and His family. God is still penetrating dark places with the light of Jesus Christ. And, He is pleased to use the local church to break through the darkness in order to be the light.<br />
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Questions to Ponder:<br />
1. What opposition is the church facing today?<br />
2. What "worship" dominates our local culture?<br />
3. Is the local church impacting the culture? Why or why not?<br />
4. What is the place of the local church in reaching the lost and expanding God's glory? <br />
5. Are you committed to the local church and do you see it as the most viable means by which Christians can impact the world for Christ? Why or why not?<br />
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<br />paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-66341891236745705792010-11-09T08:49:00.000-08:002010-11-09T08:49:31.512-08:00Identity-A Life Changing RealityI am beginning a study in 1 Corinthians. I love this book of the Bible because the Christians at Corinth remind me of my life before Christ (totally pagan) and the transforming power of the gospel! My study this morning took me no further then the opening words..."Paul, called to be an apostle by the will of God". Paul knew his identity was rooted in God. It was God who called Paul. The call was the will of God. It was a call to be an emissary or ambassador for the gospel. While the office of an apostle is limited, the work of God's people to be ambassadors for the King and His Kingdom carries on. John Piper got me thinking about my own identity and call..."Brenda, called to be a wife and mother by the will of God for the glory of Jesus Christ!" It is mind boggling to think that THE KING OF THE UNIVERSE has adopted me as His child! I have the privilege of representing Him and His Kingdom daily to my husband, children, extended family, friends, neighbors, and even strangers. Today, I am going to remember my identity and call and pray it makes a difference in how I live. I hope you will too!<br />
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Points to Ponder:<br />
1. What is your identity rooted it in? Is it how you look? How your children behave? Is it in your material possessions? <br />
2. Do you see whatever your "job" is as the means by which you are called to be an ambassador for Christ? Your "job" is a platform to preach the Good News!paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-91669364723230851992010-10-19T06:57:00.000-07:002010-10-19T06:58:34.767-07:00Doing the Word!<em>“Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says”</em> (James 1:22). One of the advantages of being a stay-at-home wife/mom is the opportunity to attend weekly Bible studies. And, if a woman prioritizes her time correctly she can make time for a regular intake of God’s Word. (It might look different in content and depth from season to season but should be a part of your routine.) Sadly, the influence of extra bible studies and regular quiet times does not always translate to how we live each day with our husband and children. I once heard John Piper say that when he sinned against his wife he was particularly distraught over it because he spent far more time studying the Word than she did. <br />
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Oftentimes, I hear women complain that their husbands are not in a small group, do not have accountability, or do not have regular devotionals (or devotionals they consider deep enough). While all of these may be legitimate concerns, how is your time in the Word impacting you? Have you considered how your husband might be more motivated to be in the Word if he saw the difference it was making in your life? Titus 2:3-5 tells us that we are to love our husbands, children and keep our homes so that the Word of God is not maligned. In other words, the gospel should not be hindered on account of our inconsistent lifestyles, especially in our homes. True religion produces the virtues of a godly wife and mother; when it does not it will be seen as having no value.<br />
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Is your time in the Word a way to “check off” your religious duties or is it how you draw closer to the Living God in order to changed by Him? How can you know if you are changing? Is the fruit of the Spirit growing in your heart and life? Is there more love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control today than last week, month or year? Are you more characterized by love as a result of your time in the Word?<em> “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres”</em> (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). <br />
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My friend, if your time in the Word is not yielding good fruit (obedience to God) you are deceived. You are betraying yourself by false-reasoning, a reasoning not based on Truth. James goes on to say, <em>“Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does”</em> (James 1:23-25). It’s God Word and obedience to His Word that gives freedom. When you reason according to your past, your feelings, or your own carnal thinking, you will remain in bondage. The deception is to believe your way will give you freedom, it simply ain’t so. How long will you remain a slave to sin and take the beating from the slave master? Jesus offers freedom through obedience to His Word.<br />
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Where are you deceiving yourself? Jesus said,<em> "Why do you call me, 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do what I say?”(</em>Luke 6:46). If you are unwilling to surrender areas of sin in your life to the Lord or if you are characterized by disobedience to the Word, do you really know Him? Where are you disobedient to the Word? Do you continue to sin against your child in anger? Are you unsubmissive or disrespectful to your husband? Do you abuse your time, money, or resources spending them on personal pleasure with no thought of Christ and His Kingdom? Are you discontent with the circumstances God has ordained for you? Are you holding a grudge or being vindictive? Are you being willful, stubborn, or rebellious in even one area of your life?<br />
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How can you change, do what the Word says! Quit making excuses. You have everything you need to be obedient to God’s Word: His Spirit, His Word and the Church. You are without excuse before your Maker and Redeemer. Quit believing your own false reasoning. Pray and ask the Lord to help you with your unbelief and to help you take your thoughts captive-comparing your own faulty reasoning to His Truth. My friend, only when you lay down your pride and selfishness and begin to listen and do God’s Word (forsaking your own foolishness) will you experience the peace and favor of the Lord. <em>"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock”</em> (Matthew 7:24). May God in His great mercy give us ears to hear Him and Him alone and to walk in faith and obedience to all He has commanded-and all for His glory!paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-56435628531025549502010-09-26T06:19:00.000-07:002010-09-26T06:20:41.196-07:00Mentors and Moms Fall Bible Study<strong>What</strong>: <u>The Faithful Parent</u> by Stuart Scott and Martha Peace. <br />
<strong>When:</strong> Friday, Sept 24 <br />
<strong>Time</strong>: 10:30-12:00<br />
<strong>Where:</strong> Eastwood Presbyterian Church Fellowship Hall<br />
<strong>How:</strong> Need a Book or have Questions: E-mail Brenda Payne paynecounselor@gmail.com (Deadline Friday, Sept. 17th) Nursery Reservations Required: E-mail KC White kcwhiteal@gmail.com (Deadline Monday , Sept. 13 th ) <br />
<br />
<strong>Study Syllabus:</strong><br />
<br />
<strong>Week 1</strong> (Sept. 24) -Chapter 1 <em>The Goal of Parenting and One's Hope </em>Chapter 2 <em>Salvation and Sanctification of the Child </em>–Teacher:Tiffany Higginbotham <br />
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<strong>Week 2</strong> (Oct. 1) -Chapter 3 <em>Infant </em> Chapter 4 <em>Toddler </em>- Teacher:Rebekah Pittman <br />
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<strong>OCTOBER 8-HOLIDAY-No Study</strong><br />
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<strong>Week 3</strong> (Oct. 15) -Chapter 5 <em>The Preschooler </em>Chapter 6 <em>The School age Child</em> -Teacher: Lauren Hixon<br />
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<strong>Week 4</strong> (Oct. 22) - Chapter 7 <em>The Teenager</em> Chapter 8 <em>Parents Who Provoke</em> - Teacher:Ginger Jacks <br />
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<strong>Week 5</strong> ( Oct. 29)-Chapter 9 <em>Special Cases</em> - Teacher: Brenda Payne <br />
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<strong>Week 6</strong> (Nov. 5) -Chapter 10 <em>When Things Don't Go as Planned</em> -Teaher:Gretchen Beaulieupaynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-23858743519466296582010-09-26T06:12:00.000-07:002010-09-26T06:12:31.537-07:00Mortifying Your Sinful Desires"It is <em>evil desire</em> that causes us to sin. All sin is desired, or perhaps the perceived benefits of the sin are desired, before the sin is acted upon. Satan appeals to us first of all through our desires. Eve saw "that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom" (Genesis 3:6). Note how the concept of desire is implied in "good for food" and "pleasing to the eye," as well as explicitly mentioned in "desirable for gaining wisdom." <br />
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<br />
John Owen was very perceptive on this subject: "<u>sin also carries on its war by entangling the affections [desires] and drawing them into an alliance against the mind [our reason].</u> <u>Grace may be enthroned in the mind, but if sin controls the affections, it has seized a fort from which it will continually assault the soul.</u> Hence, as we shall see, <u>mortification is chiefly directed to take place upon the affections</u>." (Excerpt taken from The Discipline of Grace)"<br />
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From Daily Jerry Bridges Devotionalpaynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-73383452965002880802010-09-12T14:58:00.000-07:002010-09-12T15:04:02.410-07:00"The Beauty of a Christian Woman"- A Meek and Gentle SpiritThis is a rather lengthy blog, but totally worth the read. It is an excellent sermon on what it means to have a "meek and gentle spirit". I am printing it off for further meditation and am also making a copy for my 17-year-old daughter. What beautiful and timely truths....take the time to read through each section. May God give us hearts and lives that reflect His Word.<br />
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"Dear radio friends, <br />
<br />
If you were with us last time, you will remember that we began a series of sermons on Christian marriage, specifically on the beauty of a Christian woman. Our messages are being taken from the Word of God in I Peter 3:3, 4. Please refer, once again, to those verses. <br />
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I'm not going to repeat or outline all that we said last time. But, very briefly, we saw that the Word of God emphasizes that beauty can be found only in the work of Christ in the heart. Specifically, then, for a Christian woman, beauty is not something that is restored by a plastic surgeon or purchased where the latest styles are sold. It is not if you have a perfect figure. But it is found in the hidden man of the heart, as Peter says, in that place where Christ alone can come by grace and implant His life of resurrection. <br />
<br />
Therefore, if we are ever to come to the place where, in God's estimation, we are beautiful, we must come to this truth, that what is in our hearts as children of God is more important than our hair, jewelry, or clothes. <br />
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Now we want to continue our study of this passage today and look more carefully at that beauty - what that beauty is. It is not only that God works in the heart that new life of Jesus Christ, so that living out of that life of Christ is the Christian's beauty. The apostle goes on to say that it is the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is, in the sight of God, of great price. So the essence of true beauty has to do with a certain kind of spirit. <br />
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When Peter refers there to a meek and quiet spirit, he is not referring to the Holy Spirit. Yes, the Holy Spirit is in us, but Peter is referring rather to the prevailing disposition of the soul of a child of God. The Holy Spirit is in the child of God. And when the Holy Spirit is in the child of God, then a disposition or spirit of a person is created. That is how we use the word. We say, "I don't like his spirit." We mean that there is something coming out through a person's mannerisms, through his way of speaking, all of which indicates a prevailing attitude that we do not like. Or we say, "I like her spirit." We mean that her mannerisms, her attitudes, her way of speaking - there is something very attractive about them. The inner spirit is leaking out and we are attracted to it. One's spirit, then, is the inward life, one's life as it is lived toward God. <br />
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Peter, we must remember, is talking of the child of God who has been renewed by the Spirit of life. Renewal in Christ, our relationship to God, how we live toward God - that is always leaking out. That is our spirit. We cannot keep it in. Through our eyes, through facial expression, through body language, through words, through attitudes, it all leaks out. The Word of God says that the essence of beauty is the spirit of a woman. That renewed heart, pervading all of the woman's relationship to God, as that relationship to God begins to filter through her life, that is beauty in the sight of God. <br />
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Peter emphasizes two things about that spirit: it is meek and it is quiet. We must remember that the Word of God is not addressing here personality, temperament. The Word of God is speaking here of graces, gifts, given of God, the gifts or graces of meekness and quietness. A meek and a quiet spirit may be found in a woman who has a bubbly, out-going, vivacious personality. It does not mean that a woman is carnal if she is a bubbly type of person. Or a meek and a quiet spirit may be in a shy and retiring personality. But again we must emphasize that these are graces. The mere fact that a woman is shy and retiring is not proof of the graces of gentleness and meekness in Jesus Christ. Meekness and quietness are a grace. The apostle is not referring to something that comes from a person's genes. A shy person may know nothing of meekness and quietness. A shy person inside might be filled with all types of resentment. <br />
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We must, then, get away from all the wooden and plastic notions of how this will express itself in different personality types. God is a God of great variety. God calls to Himself men and women from a broad scope of temperaments. And we must remember that the church is not all walking in lock-step, that is, all one type of personality. That is characteristic of the cults - that we must all conform to one type of personality.<br />
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The apostle is not referring to something that comes from a person's genes. No, this is a reference to the graces of meekness and quietness - a meek or gentle spirit. This word "meek" is used in the beatitudes (Matt. 5:5), "Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth." And it is used two times in reference to Jesus Christ. In Matthew 11:28-30 the Lord says, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my burden upon you, … for I am meek and lowly of heart." Again, in Matthew 21:5, we read of the Lord's triumphant entry into Jerusalem when He rode upon the colt, the foal of an ass, "Behold, thy King cometh unto thee, meek, and sitting upon an ass, and a colt the foal of an ass." We could translate this word "meek" as "gentle." We read, for instance, in Galatians 5 that "the fruit of the spirit is love, peace, joy, gentleness." Again, we read in Galatians! 6:1 that if we have an erring brother in our church we are to restore such a one in the spirit of meekness or gentleness. <br />
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So what is a meek or gentle spirit? A meek or gentle spirit is, negatively, a spirit which is not insistent on one's own rights. It is not pushy, assertive, demanding one's own way. Moses was the meekest of all men, we read in the Scriptures. Does that mean that he was not a strong leader? No! He was a strong leader. But Moses' strength was that he did not insist on himself. He was not stuck on himself. He did not push himself forward. He did not look at his leadership in terms of himself and his own ambitions of glory. He was a meek and gentle man. He sought the will of God and firmly followed it. Meekness, then, is the willing surrender, by the grace of God, of our own rights, our own ease, our own advance, and a willingness to serve the advance of God in others. That is a meek and gentle spirit. <br />
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Quiet, a meek and quiet spirit, we read. That word "quiet" is not essentially different. It is used, for instance, in I Thessalonians 4:11, "And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business." Quiet is an absence of a turbulent, agitated spirit which shows itself in being mouthy, aggressive, yelling, irate. A quiet, that is, a possessed or peaceful spirit. Both meekness and quietness are to be the expression of a wife's accepting and embracing her divinely-appointed place of subjection to her husband. We must not forget the context. It is speaking of the duty of the wife to be subject to her husband. That can only be in the way of a meek and quiet spirit. A meek and quiet spirit is a spirit which embraces the will of God for me and, in this case with a married woman, subjection to my husband. <br />
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Meekness, then, is the willing surrender,by the grace of God, of our own rights,our own ease, our own advance,and a willingness to serve the advance of God in others. We read, for instance, in I Timothy 2:9-11, "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; … Let a woman learn in silence with all subjection." You see, quietness and submission. Paul does not mean that the Christian woman becomes mute, that she does not speak. Of course not. But he means the Christian woman embraces the calling, the will of God, given to her in her marriage. She is quiet. She accepts, she finds peace with, the fact that she has been made a woman, made a wife. Meekness and quietness. That results in accepting, subjecting oneself to, the will of God. <br />
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You see, subjection, whether that is in marriage or in any other part of life, is not merely the ability to grit your teeth. Sometimes we think that that is subjection: I'll just grit my teeth. Then it is like the Quaker boy at the meeting on Sunday. He was standing. His mother said to him, "Alright, the meeting has begun. The talking is done. Sit down." He responded to her, "I sit on the outside, but on the inside I'm still standing." That is not subjection. A meek and a quiet spirit is a spirit which joyfully embraces the will of God for my life, joyfully embraces the will of God for my place - here, a woman in subjection to her husband. Meekness and quietness consists in this: all that is in Christ is mine, the inheritance of glory, the precious blood of Jesus Christ, salvation (full salvation) in Jesus Christ...subjection, whether that is in marriage or in any other part of life, is not merely the ability to grit your teeth.<br />
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Exactly what women and girls apart from God do not want to hear and cannot have is the calling of the Christian woman and is the beauty of the Christian woman. The beauty of the Christian woman is a meek and a quiet spirit. Apart from Jesus Christ a woman and a girl has a turbulent, warlike spirit. That more and more becomes plain in this world. In the world, women apart from Christ feel threatened. They feel that they must assert themselves, they must take a place because they do not have a place. They do not know the satisfaction and fullness that is to be found in Jesus Christ. There is one thing that makes us meek and gentle and self-emptying, whether we are a man or a woman. Meekness and quietness are not graces just for a woman. They are Christian graces. There is one thing that gives us quietness and peace in our hearts, an inward strength and contentment. That is the po!ssession of the redemption that is in Jesus Christ. We say, by grace, the Lord is the portion of my soul, the Lord is my Shepherd, I will lay me down in peace. <br />
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In verse 4 the apostle tells us that this inward beauty, revealed in a meek and a quiet spirit, is of great price. He tells us that the great price of this beauty is found in two things. 1) It is not a corruptible beauty. In this epistle the apostle has been using that word, incorruptible and corruptible. He has told us in chapter 1:4, for instance, that we have an inheritance incorruptible, undefiled, and that fadeth not away. Then he told us in verse 18 of that chapter that we know that we were not redeemed with corruptible things, as silver and gold, but by the blood of Christ, and that we are born again, verse 23, of an incorruptible seed in Christ. The beauty that God gives to a Christian woman within her heart is an incorruptible beauty. It is a beauty that death cannot touch, that does not fade, that does not perish. It partakes of the nature of our inheritance in heaven. !It is a beauty which does not grow old or lose its luster. It is a beauty that shines more and more. The most beautiful women of God very often are those who are the most advanced in age. The beauty of Christ is an unperishing beauty. <br />
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Now, dear girls and women, do you want a beauty which does not fade? A beauty that knows no wrinkles? A beauty that does not wash away like mascara, that is not rubbed off with a towel? A beauty that lasts, a beauty that is imperishable? This is the beauty that is to be found in Jesus Christ. This is His life in you, a life of trust and obedience in Him. Death and old age cannot touch it because it is the impression upon your soul of the likeness of Jesus Christ. When you see the beautiful women of the world, and everyone bowing down to them and worshiping at their feet and lusting, do you see the folly, the utter folly? I wish not to be cynical but to bring the truth. The Word of God says, "Dear beautiful woman, perfect figure, if the Lord tarries a short time, you will be old. You might, indeed, be forgotten in a nursing home, wrinkled, no family to visit you. And you shall die. In the grave, worms and maggots will crawl over you." Now, you say, I am being morbid? No. This is reality. Hear the Word of God: a plastic surgeon and facial cream can go only so far. They cannot overcome the grave. If your life is consumed in the outward beauty, how pathetic! It is vanishing. Stop, stop trying to erase the signs of death. Many women are still pursuing the allusive beauty of youth. They think that that is beauty. Their beauty will be their hair, their jewels, their clothes. This beauty fades away. But not the beauty in Christ. <br />
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This beauty is of great price because, in the second place, God places great value on it. This word is used in Mark 14:3 to describe the perfume which Mary used to anoint Christ - it was of great price, it was very valuable, it was expensive. Peter says, When God sees the beauty of Christ in His Christian woman and girl, He says, that's very valuable, that's very expensive, that's of great worth. That's the beauty of Christ. Oh, it is valuable and expensive. In the sight of God it is valuable. Why is it so valuable? Because God sees His face and His grace, because He sees His purpose in Jesus Christ being fulfilled in you. He knows that as the fruit of the redemptive work of His Son He grants to you a beauty of trust and love in Him in your heart. In you, as a woman who of yourself can only be ugly in your sins, He sees the grace of Jesus Christ. He sees coming ou!t of you the confession, "I will be that which God wants me to be." He sees beauty in you. He sees a heart made by His own hands which wants to please God. <br />
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Is pleasing God important to you? Every child of God wants God's smile. And every child of God dreads God's frown. In the sight of God, this beauty is of great price. It is fair and lovely. It is beautiful, and it is beautiful to us, too. It is beautiful to you as a man, is it not? Husband, young man, can you recognize beauty when you see it, or not? Do you see spiritual beauty, do you place a great value on it? Do you? Christian women, that is why we love you in Christ. We love you, not as a man who is enamored by a woman on a magazine cover. Do you want that kind of love? That is not love, that is lust. That is after an object. That is using you. Is that the kind of love you want from your boyfriend, the kind of love that a man shows (love in quotes here), the kind of lust that a man shows when he is! looking at a magazine? Is that what you want for yourself? Oh, no! There is dignity in the Christian woman and it is found in Jesus Christ. You are to love that Christian wife and woman with the love which honors and respects and delights in the beauty that God has given to her in her heart. Can you see that? <br />
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Christian woman, are you beautiful? Then remember, once again, women, girls, men, and boys, remember, beauty is not something that you put on. It is not something that you diet to get. It is not something that is shown in low-cut tops exposing the flesh or in shrunken tops exposing the belly button. It is not something seductive. It is not something tight fitting. It is in the heart.... beauty is not something that you put on.... It is not something tight fitting. It is in the heart.<br />
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Is that what you want? The Word of God tells us that a woman could have a physical beauty which could turn heads and be attractive, but that apart from Him, there is only the emptiness of sin. Proverbs 11:22, "As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion." Girls, women, do not fashion yourself after the Barbie doll, after the picture on the magazine Young Sixteen, or Cosmopolitan, or whatever. That is not what beauty is. If that is all that you have, there is emptiness, a horrible emptiness. Beauty is Christ! Beauty is God! Beauty is God's glory shining out of us. Beauty is being conformed in word, thought, action, desires, attitudes, to Jesus Christ. And it is a beauty that does not fade. It is !a beauty that catches the eye, oh, yes! God's eye. And He rejoices. And we do too. We rejoice. For in Jesus Christ we stand beautiful before God, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that we should be holy and without blemish before Him. <br />
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God bless His Word to our hearts. <br />
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By Rev. Carl Haak (reformedwitnesshour.org)paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-22947304752202140452010-09-03T06:34:00.000-07:002010-09-03T06:34:12.473-07:00Mentors and Moms Fall Bible StudyPlease mark your calendars and join the Mentors and Moms Fall Bible study on <u>The Faithful Parent</u> by Stuart Scott and Martha Peace. <br />
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<strong>Date:</strong> Friday, Sept 24 <br />
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<strong>Time:</strong> 10:30-12:00<br />
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<strong>Place:</strong> Eastwood Presbyterian Church Fellowship Hall<br />
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<strong>Need a Book or have Questions</strong>: E-mail Brenda Payne paynecounselor@gmail.com (Deadline Friday, Sept. 17th) <br />
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<strong>Nursery Reservations Required</strong>: E-mail KC White kcwhiteal@gmail.com (Deadline Monday , Sept. 13 th ) <br />
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*The fall Bible study is a <em>six week</em> commitment. We will not meet on Oct. 8th when school is out.paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-29765640380161385192010-08-30T07:53:00.000-07:002010-08-30T08:08:20.204-07:00Training Ladies-It's Hard Work! I have had the privilege of encouraging a newly married wife on how to control her emotional (and often sinful) actions and reactions to her husband. I was struck by her sincere desire to change and the frustration she felt over the futile results. I asked how she was tackling the problem. Through tear-filled eyes, she told me that she prayed everyday for God to grant her self-control. However, by the end of the day she had failed yet again. I told her while prayer was the starting and ending point of all of her efforts, it was in no way the only resource God had put at her disposal for change. In fact, I asked her what would happen if I decided to run the Montgomery half-marathon in October and all I did to prepare was pray! I can tell you, I would pass out! Running that marathon will require regular physical training. It will cost time, energy, emotion, and I will often have to fight against my feelings to persevere. I will need a training plan, accountability, and the right equipment. There would be good days and bad days in my training regime, but if I intended to run it I would have to train for it. What is true in the physical realm is also true in the spiritual realm: <em>"Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come"</em> (1 Timothy 4:8). I am not minimizing the power of prayer, but as Christians we must recognize the work God has given us to do in the sanctification process. How did I encourage my friend to "train" in righteousness? The same way I encourage anyone needing a spiritual help: Pray and Work!<br />
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<strong>1. Have consistent time in the Word</strong>. Her ability to respect her husband and control her emotions is directly related to her intake of God's Word. She needs to give the Holy Spirit what He needs to cultivate the fruit of the Spirit in her life.<br />
<strong>2. Memorize relevant passages of Scripture. </strong>The Word will enable her to transform her mind through daily renewal. She will be able to take her thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ when her thoughts are His. This is also an excellent way to ensure she is praying according to God's will! <br />
<strong>3. Journaling. </strong>I cannot overstate the importance of writing down struggles for the sake of working through them biblically.Change takes thought and time to "put off" old patterns of thinking and "put on" new ones. Journaling is the most effective tool I have seen to bring about change and to allow others to help and hold you accountable to change. Here are the initial questions I asked my friend to write down.<br />
<strong>a.</strong> What were the circumstances that led to my (fill in the blank with an emotion like anger, disappointment, frustration,etc.)?<br />
<strong>b.</strong> What did I say to myself when I became (_______)? This is very important! She must write it down just as she is thinking it each time. Put it in quotations! Don't cheat. <br />
<strong>c</strong>. How does God want me to think about this circumstance? What is true about my circumstance and what is the TRUTH of God's Word concerning my situation? She must use Bible verses and pull from wisdom, knowledge and understanding about herself, her husband, and God.<br />
<strong>4. Accountability.</strong> My friend needs to have several women who will pray for her and with her and help her love God and her husband the way the Bible prescribes. She needs other committed people who will help her sort through the distortion of her thinking. We all struggle with seeing ourselves accurately. The Body of Christ is meant to help us have a correct view and to help us change incorrect views.<br />
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These are foundational principles for "training in righteousness". What about you? Where are you struggling? Have you been content to ask God to do for you what He intends for you to do yourself (in His strength and with His wisdom)? If you are caught in any sinful pattern, don't stay spiritually unfit-start your work out now!paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-79722499832273865942010-08-24T07:18:00.000-07:002010-08-24T07:18:45.556-07:00What Song is in Your Heart?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dx1sc2869Crq30OhNvSutEDNSPPwmeRnS4K0oGVOh_DRbn04ZFgzGFpgI9TEtdvQSjP-1SSamnjKvo725BmzQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>Quick video. Great message! Enoy.paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-40757723820279954462010-08-24T06:51:00.000-07:002010-08-24T06:52:51.484-07:00Spiritual DrynessDo you ever get into a "spiritual slump"? That's where I have been living the past few weeks. I have not had good time in the Word. My prayer life has been sporadic. My thoughts have felt disjointed. I have been distracted in corporate worship. I have been unmotivated to spiritual disciplines. It's not that my love for God has waned; I am just in a "funk". Can you relate? <br />
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What do you do when your spiritual life feels like a desert? First of all, you need to examine the factors that might be contributing to the problem.<br />
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<strong>• Busyness.</strong> If you are being "Martha" doing too many things, you can be too exhausted to do the one most needful thing. Even the good can become the enemy of the best! Your output cannot exceed your input if you are going to be effective for Christ. Is your schedule so packed that you are too tired to spend time with Jesus?<br />
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<strong>• Misplaced Priorities.</strong> Perhaps you are not too busy but you have just allowed other things, even good things, to take the place of time with the Savior. Is spending time with the Lord through time in the Word and prayer a priority in your day?<br />
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<strong>• Failure to Plan.</strong> Currently, I am struggling with what to study. I completed the 1 John study this summer and I don't have a new plan. I find if I do not have a plan for Bible study; it is much easier to neglect it. Do you have a plan for spending time in the Word? If not, go ahead and pick a book of the Bible to read through or perhaps you have an old devotional you can dust off and use. Don't be stagnant, stay active. In the process, you can pray and search for a study.<br />
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<strong>• Laziness.</strong> Sometimes a lack of time with God just comes down to sheer laziness! You don't feel like it. You need to enlist accountability when you find yourself unmotivated and giving into your feelings. Any relationship takes time and energy to make the investment. Could your dryness be a by-product of laziness?<br />
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<strong>• Unconfessed or Habitual Sin.</strong> If you are stuck in a sin, you will be tempted to run from God instead of to Him. Evaluate your life and ask the Lord to reveal unconfessed sin. Deal seriously with patterns of sin in your life. Do you have unconfessed sin? Are you enslaved to some sin that keeps you discouraged? Fly to Jesus!<br />
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<strong>• Fatigue. Sickness. Hormones.</strong> There is no doubt that physical factors can contribute to spiritual dryness. You should do what you can to take care of yourself physically. Are you exhausted? Are you dealing with a chronic sickness? Are you hormonal? Don't allow these reasons to become excuses to stay out of the Word. In times of suffering and weakness, you need the Lord the most. <br />
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<strong>• Depression/Discouragment.</strong> It is often most difficult to seek the Lord when you are down. If you are emotionally depleted, you need God but it can seem overwhelming to spend time in the Word. Commit to bite size pieces. Are you down? Don't give up or give in, dig deeper!<br />
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I am taking time this week to evaluate my spiritual dryness in light of the reasons above. In the meantime, I am jumping back in with both feet. My biggest enemy is my feelings. Even sitting down to write this blog was taxing, but I did it and I am glad! Here is my battle plan:<br />
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<strong>1</strong>. Pick a devotional to begin today.<br />
<strong>2</strong>. Choose a passage to being memorizing.<br />
<strong>3.</strong> Download some praise music to my ipod.<br />
<strong>4.</strong> Download a sermon or two to listen to as I exercise this week.<br />
<strong>5</strong>. Meet with a friend for encouragement and accountability.<br />
<strong>6</strong>. Be consistent regardless of my feelings. Don’t allow the lack of feelings to discourage me. Press on!<br />
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I realize the Christian life is not always a “spiritual high” and I am not seeking to be emotionally driven. However, I want to love the Lord with <em>all </em>of me-my mind, emotions, and my body! I know He wants this too. I am confident that the Lord will return to me the zeal I desire as I commit to seek Him and continue to walk in His ways.<br />
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<strong>Point to Ponder and Post:</strong><br />
1. What reasons do you see contribute to spiritual dryness?<br />
2. What do you do to overcome times of spiritual dryness?paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-25343923126215268732010-08-01T14:27:00.000-07:002010-08-01T14:27:35.589-07:00How Do You Show Respect?I would love some feedback on how you have learned to respect your husband? What have been your struggles and how have you overcome them? How have you discovered your husband's particular desires for respect? How have you accomodated him? What benefits have you seen from respect and disrespect? Let's spur eachother on!<br />
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PS...If you post as "anonymous"...well then you will be anonymous! That means no one will know who you are:)paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-20502383031460645622010-07-29T05:34:00.000-07:002010-07-29T05:34:48.617-07:00What's Your Goal? Holiness or Happenstance"Someone has observed that oftentimes Christians don't make it their goal not to sin--we make it our goal not to sin <em>too much.</em>" Max Lucado, 1 John (pg.39)<br />
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If we are not purposeful to mortify sin in our lives than chances are we won't! My good friend and mentor Kristi Gant used to tell me, "Plan not to sin". So often we don't plan on sinning, but we do so because we have failed to plan<em> not</em> to sin! What sinful pattern has ensnared you? Is it something you continue to do or something you are failing to do? Pursue holiness. Don't settle for half-hearted devotion to your Lord and Savior; sell out!<br />
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Points to Ponder and Post:<br />
1. Where in your life are you struggling with sin? Are you radically dealing with it or just "keeping it under control"?<br />
2. What are you doing to do about it? How will you plan not to sin?paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-58854192768594536482010-07-28T05:37:00.000-07:002010-07-28T05:37:42.830-07:00Book Review-"When Sinners Say 'I Do'" by Dave HarveyIf you are discouraged in your marriage, this book is sure to change your outlook. A relatively short book at 183 pages, but chalked full of exhortations on understanding and applying grace to your marriage. Harvey's writing style is filled with great word pictures making difficult themes easy to understand. This is one of those books that I wanted to highlight every other sentence! This book would make a great gift for anyone struggling in their marriage. The theme of the book is how to apply God's grace to ourselves and how we can extend it to our husbands. God's grace should make a difference in our marriages!<br />
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"In this book, I want to convince you that dealing with the sin problem is key to thriving in marriage. When we apply the gospel to our sin, it gives us hope in our personal lives and in our marriages. Bad news leads to great news.It's the story of the Bible, and the story of our lives."<br />
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"Marriage was not just <em>invented </em>by God, it <em>belongs </em>to God. He has unique claim over its desing, purpose, and goals. It actually exists for him <em>more</em> than it exists for you and me and our spouses. God is the most important person in a marriage. Marrige is for our good, but it is first for God's glory."<br />
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Points to Ponder and Post:<br />
1. Have you read this book? What is your opinion of it?<br />
2. How did it impact you? Do you have a favorite quote you can share from the book?paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-40512913647752669402010-07-21T19:59:00.000-07:002010-07-21T20:00:15.354-07:00Respecting Your HusbandI am working on some material to help disrespectful wives. I thought I would try some of it out on my readers! would love some feedback.<br />
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Acknowledge Your Total Dependence Upon God. <br />
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First of all, you must depend upon the Holy Spirit. He alone can change your sinful heart. Respecting your husband, especially when you don’t feel like it or when he doesn’t “deserve” it, is a supernatural act. In your flesh, you will be prone to give into your feelings and live for your own kingdom causes! It takes daily dependence upon the Lord, to do what you don’t feel like doing and to live in light of His eternal Kingdom. If respect is a major battlefield for you, fall on your face before the Lord (literally) and cry out for His strength, wisdom and grace (supernatural help from heaven) to walk in faith and obedience to His commands. <br />
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What is dependence? It is trust and reliance. Think about the people you trust, why do you trust them? Undoubtedly, because you deem them reliable. Their character and actions give credence to their words; you believe them because they have proven themselves. These are the people you can call on night or day, they laugh when you laugh and cry when you cry, in a crisis they are your "go to" people. Dependence upon God involves trusting Him and relying on Him. How do you cultivate this type of dependence? It begins with saturating your mind with the Word of God and learning to pray biblically for your marriage. <br />
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You come to know God as He talks to you through His Word. The Scriptures tell you who God is and what He requires of you. God has given you a historical account of His love; His proven faithfulness. If you don’t trust God maybe it’s because you don’t really know Him. Knowing God is a one time event (coming to Him through faith in Christ) but it’s also a process of learning and seeing His excellencies throughout your lifetime. If you struggle with trusting God’s Word, I want to encourage you to study His attributes. Knowing God, as He is found in the Scriptures, chases away the fear of trusting Him.<br />
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God’s Word not only reveals Who God is but also gives us a blueprint for godly living. The way you demonstrate you have faith in someone is by relying on them for counsel, strength, resources, or whatever the need may be. You must rely upon God’s Word to instruct you in God’s ways. The Bible says us, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). You can rely on God’s Word to teach you God’s standards for a husband, a wife, and his design for marriage. You can rely on God’s Word to convict you when you are out of sync with God’s revealed will. You can rely on God’s Word to show you how to correct your wrong motivations, attitudes, words and actions. And you can look to God’s Word to show you how to develop a lifestyle characterized by godliness. Depending on the Lord means you choose His ways over your own ways; regardless of your feelings or past experience. <br />
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Another practical demonstration of dependence is prayer. Prayer is how you talk to God. Through prayer you praise God, reminding yourself of His attributes and His works. Prayer is the avenue by which you confess your sins to Him, receiving forgiveness and cleansing and a clear conscience. And, prayer is the means by which you seek God’s help to be the wife you cannot be apart from His work in your life. Is your desire to respect your husband lacking? Cry out to God. Is your understanding of how to go about it wanting? Cry out to God. Have you grown weary in well doing? Cry out to God. Listen to the psalmist, “Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge” (Psalm 62:8). Respecting your husband can be a difficult command to obey, when it is, fly to Jesus in prayer. I want to encourage you to learn how to pray biblically for your marriage. What is biblical praying? It is praying for those things which are agreeable to the will of God. For instance, let’s say I think we need a new car. I could pray, “God, please put it on Paul’s heart to buy me a new car. I would really like it to be tan with leather interior and could you throw in the gps and dual dvd players! You know our car is old Lord and has many miles and we need a new one!” Or I could pray, “Lord, please help us to be good stewards of our finances and possessions. I pray you will direct Paul in how we can best use our finances to honor you. I pray you will give him knowledge and wisdom to make the right decision about our transportation needs. Help me to offer good counsel, to be content with what I have or what I get, and to trust you to work through Paul.” Do you see the difference? One prayer is all about me! It reads like a wish list to Santa Clause. The second prayer has God as it’s focus and acknowledges my husbands headship and my desire to be a helper to him.<br />
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Deepening respect for your husband starts and ends with a deepening dependence upon the Lord. Your relationship with your husband, especially if it’s difficult, could be the very thing God is using to drive you to depend on Him. <br />
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Points to Ponder:<br />
1. What has helped you grow in dependence on the Lord?<br />
2. When it is difficult to respect your husband (either because of his sin or yours) how have you seen God use His Word or prayer to bring you to obedience?paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-18192403943378882612010-07-17T06:07:00.000-07:002010-07-17T06:07:11.127-07:00"Behold the Love of God"If you have i-tunes, I would encourage you to download a sermon by Tim Keller on 1 John 3:1-3 entitled "Behold the Love of God". It's free on i-tunes! Keller,one of my favorite preachers, does an amazing job of explaining the outburst of emotion the disciple John demonstrates in these passages. You will be greatly encouraged and challenged by this sermon. You can also go to sermons.redeemer.com to purchase the sermon in an mp3 format or on a cd. If I can figure out a way to post it to my blog, I will. You can find other free downloads by Tim Keller on i-tunes as well.paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-82099114119740855902010-07-12T06:40:00.000-07:002010-07-12T06:40:05.435-07:00PayneQuote-Heavenly and HeavyAfter speaking with a mom going through a serious trial with her teenage child, I was struck again by the weightiness of parenting. It is a heavenly calling but also a heavy calling. For those of you with little children you might think my next statement is harsh, but those of you with teenagers can appreciate my sentiment.<br />
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"It is a mercy of God that parenting only lasts 18-21 years because it is too heavy a matter to be responsible for people you cannot control!"<br />
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As our children mature into young adults, we must allow God the opportunity to mold them and shape them through their successes and failures and through their wisdom and foolishness. Of course, we continue to pour into them but our limitations become glaringly evident. Our dependence upon the Lord to work an "inside job" is a greater reality than ever before.<br />
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Parenting teenagers and young adults sends you to your knees and puts this prayer on your heart, "God have mercy on us!" May the Lord be merciful to us His children and His children's children as week seek to raise a generation that will worship Him.<br />
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Points to Ponder and Post:<br />
1. Have you found it difficult to transtion from parenting children to young adults? What has helped you?<br />
2. Where have you seen God's mercy in parenting your older children?paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-78734034259685170052010-07-08T06:36:00.000-07:002010-07-08T06:36:30.166-07:00The Counselor's Corner BeginsI want to begin a new section of my blog: "The Counselor's Corner". If you have a better idea for a name, by all means submit it! I do not intend for this to be an exhaustive means for biblical counseling but I hope it can be tool to sharpen your ability to connect the Scriptures to everyday life. If you have a question you would like for me to attempt to answer, please e-mail me at <a href="mailto:paynecounselor@gmail.com">paynecounselor@gmail.com</a>. The question will be posted in a "flattened out" way, removing all personally incriminating information. I also hope that many of you will weigh in with your own thoughts and encouragement from the Scriptures. Let's continue to spur one another on toward love and good deeds, and all the more as we see the Day approaching!paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-40745136085407731382010-07-08T06:26:00.000-07:002010-07-08T06:28:27.201-07:00The Antichrist and antichrists-What's the Difference?There is a lot of information available on Antichrist and antichrists; some biblical and much that is erroneous. When studying these topics, be very discerning. I recommend running your findings through your pastor; that's what I did. Information about end times, the Antichrist and even dealing with modern day antichrists is both intriguing and frightening. Thankfully, as believers we have our hope in the One who has already defeated them all. Because of Him, we remain aware and alert but need not be afraid.<br />
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<strong>Speaking of the Antichrist</strong><br />
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“Scripture teaches Antichrist to be a political, religious, individual, yet to come in the future (as of this writing), who is opposed to God and God's Christ and God's church. Antichrist is a false Christ, according to Matthew 24:24. He claims to be anointed by God with the Holy Spirit and claims to be qualified to do the work in God's name of redeeming God's people and renewing the creation. But he is not. He is a liar. His claims are false. He is a false Christ. A little word study may help to understand the prefix "anti" in the name Antichrist. Just as antivenom is given to counteract the venom of a snake bite, and antiseptic is used against infection, so Antichrist is against, is opposed to, Jesus Christ. This tells us the essence of what Antichrist is: he is opposition to God's Christ. He is opposition to Christ personally; he is against Christ's Church; he is against Christ's Word, Holy Scripture. Furthermore, because Christ's mission is to show the name of Jehovah God to men by showing Himself to them (see John 17:6, John 14:8,9, and Revelation 13:6), Antichrist is opposed to God Himself. <em>So, although the Antichrist will leave the impression that his motivating force is love, concern for humanity, and pity for the oppressed, what drives Antichrist is not love but hatred. The one motivating force in his life is opposition to Jesus Christ, opposition to all that He stands for, and to all that stand for Him</em>. Antichrist will be a definite individual, a particular human being. A single individual of outstanding ability and extraordinary power will arise, who is opposed to Jesus Christ and claims to be the Christ. It is significant that Antichrist will be a man. Antichrist will not be some strange creature, unrecognizable to you and me, some foreigner, a man from Mars or another solar system. Antichrist will not be a stranger to humanity. <em>Indeed, he will be the final and full development of man, of the human race. You will know him well, for his nature will be your nature. Man always has and always will claim equality and identity with God (witness the insane ravings of the Shirley MacLaines and others today). This man's claims will be believable; he will be one of us.”</em> Rev. Barry Gritters, The Antichrist/prca.org<br />
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<strong>Speaking of Many Antichrists</strong><br />
“The struggle of the people of God against Antichrist has always been and will always be a present struggle. The call to oppose Antichrist must always be given in the present imperative. Whether in the future the church's children (your children and my children) are able to withstand the Man of Sin, the Son of Perdition, depends, to a great degree, on the success of the battle we wage against his spirit today. The second beast is working; his labor is under way. We are not referring to specific persons, or particular institutions and churches.<em> We are referring to the spirit of our age that rejects God and God's Word, and promotes with all of its power, MAN.</em> The purpose of education today is man's welfare; the purpose of science is man's pleasure; the goal of entertainment is the good life for man. Hedonism says it all. The world is crowded with Antichrists presently. No, look not only on the horizon for Antichrist. Look about you. Oppose him today.” Rev. Barry Gritters, The Antichrist/prca.orgpaynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6042885822157624428.post-46979460995360670392010-07-07T20:28:00.000-07:002010-07-07T20:29:34.329-07:00Sacrifical Love<em>"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers."</em> 1 John 3:16<br />
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Sacrificial love always demands an exchange; my life for yours. <br />
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"Real love desires the highest and best-eternal life;your primary goal must be their soul's prosperity!" Joel Beeke, Love One Another<br />
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<strong>Points to Ponder and Post:</strong><br />
1. Who is it the easiest for you to sacrifice for and why? (Privately consider who is the most difficult person for you to sacrifice for and why?)<br />
2. How would you love your husband, children, family and friends differently if you made eternal life and their soul's prosperity your primary concern?paynecounselorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00159334109361722867noreply@blogger.com0